I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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