Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.
"half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
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