So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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