i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
i just wanna soil my oats bro
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Randomize
