Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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