We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
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