using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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