so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
i've created a new STD.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
