Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
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