Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
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