Your tits are I can't wait for
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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