Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
