big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
