Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
i wish my penis had a tongue
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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