Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
he fucked my hip out of place.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Randomize
