Can Purell be used as lube?
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
Randomize