Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
I got my first tattoo & injured myself while having sex in a national monument. I say we consider this weekend siezed.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
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