Why does Corona taste like a burp?
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Randomize
