Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Flight got cancelled. Stayed in the same hotel as the flight crew so now I can cross Sex with Pilot off the bucket list
He regularly flies into DC, so I’m going to sign him up for my Frequent Flyer program!
Randomize
