Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
Randomize
