Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
