pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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