Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
Randomize