i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Randomize
