you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
