Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
