Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Ladies don't puke and tell
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Randomize
