Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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