Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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