The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
