Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
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so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
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You bring me burritos. Of course I text you during sex
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
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