Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
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