I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Randomize
