It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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