the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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