I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
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