I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
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