Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Randomize
