She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
