I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
My philosophy professor just told the class that he is suspicious of dolphins. The stoner in front of me totally gets it. I need to start getting high for this class.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
