Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
