I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
