HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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