I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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