I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
