I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
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