HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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