the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Randomize
