this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize