why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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