Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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